Monday, July 27, 2009

Just say no to ab-only education

As you've probably heard, Gen X and Gen Y slackers will be the death of newspapers. And rightfully so. Jon Stewart and The Onion are entertaining, trustworthy news sources. Linda Greenhouse? Not so much.

So when I read The Onion's coverage of the failure of abstinence-only lunch programs, high school memories came rushing back to me.

Abstinence-only lunches were an integral part of my moral, spiritual, and gastrointestinal upbringing. I knew that if I wanted to snag a husband, I would have to count calories. It wasn't easy, and I was often tempted by the lure of cheap, convenient Easy Mac.

But I persevered. I chose margarine and red meat, because my teacher said butter and eggs didn't work anyway.

Some of my friends got into trouble. They ate in the back row of movie theaters. They ate in their cars, and on unsupervised class trips. And you know what happened to them?

NOTHING. Big, fat, nothing.

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[For more on abstinence-only curricula, check out FMF's toolkit here.]

Photo credit: pwbaker on Flickr